Taxes, tax attorneys, tax policy — not very funny stuff.  This is about as good as it gets.  I found it in the comments of an article I read this morning.  Somebody who goes by “Auldphart” offering his ideas for raising more revenue in this country:

Anyone who has carpeting in their house would have to pay a carpet tax.  How about a thumb tax?  Then there’s that old standby, taxing people’s patience.  If you have one or both your legs, you’d pay a shin tax. People with both legs would naturally pay twice as much.  People who have flat tires would have to pay a flat tax.  Progressives would have to pay a progressive tax, while Republicans would have to pay a regressive tax.   People leaving the country to avoid taxes woud be charged an egressive tax.  People who frequent gymnasiums would be charged an exercise tax.  Those eating at McDonald’s could be hit with something called a bigmaca tax.  Finally, people with Lyme disease or Rocky Mountain Spotted  Fever would be subject to a tick tax.